August 25, 2005

Spa night aids Next Door-Solutions to Domestic Violence

By Carol Rosen
Staff Writer

It’s a unique atmosphere that combines learning about domestic violence while being pampered at a high-end spa. That’s precisely what happened at the Los Gatos Hotel on Aug. 18 when a large crowd gathered to eat, drink and be pampered all while learning how to help victims of domestic violence.

Guests at Next Door-Solutions to Domestic Violence check in at the registration table. From the left are Judy Lavey of Saratoga; Toni Pinn, owner of the Los Gatos Hotel in Saratoga; Phyllis Meyercord of Los Gatos; and Next Door Solutions board member Pat Bashaw of Palo Alto.

This was the second spa night planned by Next Door-Solutions to Domestic Violence. Like the first evening last fall, this one was quite successful bringing together people throughout the Bay Area to help fund the 31-year-old service. While the men and women learned about what Next Door offers, they also had a chance to be pampered with massages, bid on silent auction items and just enjoy a beautiful evening in a resort-like atmosphere.

The evening offered a number of spa services including various massages, tarot card readings, hair styling and other spa services all fitting in with Next Door’s theme that “hands are for healing, not hurting!”

Last year Next Door helped more than 11,000 women
Next Door is the oldest domestic violence program in the county. It offers services in six different locations including an emergency shelter and two transitional housing complexes. It provides everything that battered men, women and their children might need including up to three years of transitional housing for those victims and their families.

“Last year we served over 11,000 women,” said Kathleen Krenek, Next Door’s executive director. “We review police reports for San Jose and Los Gatos and contact every victim to tell them about our services, the legal system and what criminal justice will be doing.”

Susan Cassens of San Jose and Pat Zahn of Evergreen talk with Veronica Caceres, a Next Door advocate about transitional housing.

Krenek added that the center’s work is not limited to women. There is a small percentage—about 3 to 5 percent—of men that are battered. “Men are welcome too, we have services for them including the only [battered] male support group in the South Bay Area,” she added.

Next Door has a budget of about $3 million, said Krenek, to provide a number of services that include help for children exposed to domestic violence. This therapy involves working with schools and the medical community to provide a better future for these young victims in addition to children’s play therapy and a teen program to reach out to teens to prevent and diminish abusive relationships.

Other programs include helping victims to work out safety before and during attacks, a batterer’s intervention program, legal advocacy including restraining orders, counseling, advocacy programs, a family violence shelter, a 24-hour hotline and 24-hour emergency shelter as well as the transitional shelter. Last year nearly 15,000 people called Next Door’s hotline.

Spa night is important not just because it helps raise funds, but it provides a method of teaching the issues in a positive way, said Krenek.

Eleven-year-old Radhika Clark gets her hair styled by Sara Major of Capelli Salon in Los Gatos. Radhika, who lives in the Cambrian/Los Gatos area, will be in the sixth grade this year at Union Middle School.

One other feature of the program, that spa night helps fund, is a holiday boutique at Christmas. Next Door solicits members and friends to donate only new items for moms, kids and teens. Volunteers decorate the community office and moms can shop for their children and kids can shop for their moms. There’s also free gift wrapping.

“At least 300 moms and kids participate,” said Krenek. “It allows these families to have a holiday with gifts they otherwise wouldn’t be able to enjoy.”

One million dollars needed
Krenek added Next Door has about 25 government grants that provide about $2 million worth of its funding. The remaining million has to be raised through private foundations, individual gifts and events like spa night. In fact, an anonymous donor offered a dollar for dollar match of all funds, up to $100,000, that Next Door could collect through Aug. 31.

“In this type of work you get to see the worst that one person does to another, but you also get to see the great resilience and sense of hope that people have,” said Krenek. “Families come into this program from an unsafe environment and you see them go through a metamorphosis. One day they are bogged down in their problems and maybe a week or a month later, you see them beginning to sit up straight.”

They get to meet others who’ve gone through situations like they have, she added, and that allows them to realize they aren’t alone. “The people go through mental and emotional crises, and while the physical battering heals more quickly, the emotional aspects don’t go away easily,” Krenek said.

Sharon Mascia of Woodside greets Kathleen Krenek during spa night.

Next Door currently has about 30 volunteers, but they always are looking for more. “We have an incredible menu of jobs,” Krenek said. “To start with, all our volunteers go through 40 hours of training. Once that’s complete, they can work with children or adults and do things like public speaking. There’s something for everyone who wants to become involved and you name the times you can work.”

It’s most important to show that “we can’t keep domestic violence in the closet. We need to talk about it openly and honestly and communicate the problem and its solutions. Remember, peace in our world begins in our homes,” she said.

Among those donating services and items at Spa Night were Preston Wynne Spa, Capelli Salon, Carmen Richardson Rutlen, who donated 500 copies of her book, “Dancing Naked in Fuzzy Red Slippers” to Next Door, Elizabeth Van Buren Aromatherapy, Pavia Day Spa, Dr. James Grubinskas and Kkreations Skin to Soul.

For more information about Next Door-Solutions to Domestic Violence, visit the office at 1181 North Fourth Street, Suite A, San Jose, Calif. 95112, call (408) 279-7550, or visit the Web site at www.nextdoor.org. The 24-hour hotline is (408) 279-2962.