July 15, 2004

Remembering Dave

Family, friends gather to celebrate Dave Dalton’s life

By Catherine Cook
Special to the Times

Dressed in Hawaiian shirts and Jimmy Buffet attire, more than 600 friends and family crowded into the Cornerstone Community Church on the afternoon of July 12 to celebrate and pay tribute to the life of David Dalton, a lifelong and beloved Almaden resident. Dalton, 45, a graduate of Leland High School and San Jose Sate University, died unexpectedly July 3 from an aortic dissection, the same illness that claimed the life of actor John Ritter last September.

A photo tribute created by Dave’s friend Jim Randleman showed photograph after photograph of a beaming Dave surrounded by friends, family, and colleagues. Five childhood friends from Almaden—John Howard, John McCarthy, Jeff McKannay, Scott Flammer and Brent Forslin—all shared their memories of a man they clearly admired and adored.

A lifelong friend of everyone whose path he crossed, the afternoon was filled with anecdotes of a man who served as a leader at work, in the Almaden community and amongst his friends. At UPS, where Dave worked for 25 years, Chris Parga, along with Janine Gold and Steve Dito, immediately launched a grassroots movement to support the Daltons when they heard about Dave’s death.

They sent out e-mails to those at UPS who knew Dave, and within a few days collected more than $3,000 to sponsor a barbecue at Almaden Lake Park following Dave’s memorial service. Parga, who got the word out and organized the barbecue, said that donations came in from around the world.

“Dave was as admired and respected at work as he was in his community and amongst his friends and family” said Parga. “Dave had the same affection and kindness towards his colleagues and clients as his did in his personal life. Professionally, Dave was a pioneer of his team, saw the need for change and innovation and then acted on it.”

Dave also saw the need for positive change at the YMCA, where he went above and beyond his volunteer responsibilities to help create a teen center, launch the YMCA’s capital campaign and help organize a fundraising golf tournament. In addition to his generous financial support, he lent his leadership skills and organizational finesse to these projects. John Remy, who worked with Dave on the board of the South Valley YMCA, attested to Dave’s dedication to Almaden and his community. “Through his involvement at the YMCA, Dave literally touched thousands of lives,” Remy said.

While Dave was exceptionally dedicated to his career and civic responsibilities, his first priority was always his family. His love for his wife, Susan, was tangible. Father to Rob, Sean and Laura, Dave devoted himself to his children and their lives. His weekends were filled with Little League games, school plays, Indian Princess outings and a thousand other activities. One had only to spend a few moments with Dave at any one of these events to know that there was no place else that he would rather be. He was beyond proud of his children and their accomplishments, and his enthusiasm and joy in participating in their lives was evident. He was truly meant to be a dad.

For those lucky enough to be included in Dave’s circle of friends, everyone knew how important gathering his friends together was to him. Annual traditions that he orchestrated included a holiday white elephant party, Fourth of July block party, Memorial Day Rough Out and an annual fishing trip with his childhood friends, which he did annually for the past 25 years.

He loved the outdoors, and spent much of his free time skiing, camping, fishing and scuba diving. Dave’s childhood friend, John McCarthy, noted that the only downside to Dave’s enthusiasm for the outdoors was that, “If Dave took up a hobby, and you were his friend, you were going to take it up too.” He was the teacher of many first time skiers and scuba divers. With his friends in tow, Dave climbed Half Dome at Yosemite, fished for king salmon in Alaska and chased tiger sharks in Monterey Bay. His was a life full of adventure.

Many friends repeated the same sentiment when talking about their relationship with Dave—that he had a gift for making everyone feel like they were his very best friend. One could not go anywhere in San Jose with Dave and not have him run into someone he knew. He was a dear friend and a fine example of the kind of person to which we should all aspire.

He believed in the value of his family, his friends and strong traditions that he worked hard to keep alive. He loved this community and gave of himself to make it exceptional. As a testament to the lives that Dave touched, friends flew in from across the country to be at his memorial service.

Adam Bell, a longtime friend, flew in from Baltimore with his family. Maeve and Eoin McGrotty, Dave’s cousins, flew in from Boston and colleagues from UPS flew in from Atlanta, Oregon and Laguna Beach to pay their respects.

“The most important thing to Dave was getting together all of the people he loved. Dave was the glue that held us all together. Looking around at this gathering of people, I know that Dave would be pleased. He would consider this a personal best,” John Howard, Dave’s childhood friend, said.

Catherine Cook is a freelance writer who lives in Almaden. She misses Dave already.