May 6, 2004

Remembering Pat Tillman, 1976-2004

Public memorial honors fallen soldier

By Kymberli W. Brady
Staff Writer

On Monday, dramatic photos placed intermittently among American flags and pungent, rose-lined paths greeted nearly 3,000 guests who had gathered at the San Jose Municipal Rose Garden to pay tribute to Almaden’s native son, Pat Tillman.

Eleven days after news of his death sent shockwaves through the community and the nation, family, friends, coaches, teammates, and soldiers came together to say goodbye to a brother, husband, son and friend. Bagpipes played in somber procession while fellow Army Rangers presented American flags to his parents Mary and Pat Sr. and his high school sweetheart and wife Marie amidst the same plot of rosebushes where they exchanged wedding vows.

Tears fused with laughter as those close to him shared moments spent with the local boy who embodied the American spirit and refused to settle for mere fame and fortune—a patriot who listened to a much higher calling—a man so moved by the tragic events of Sept. 11 that he would fight and ultimately die for his country.

The ceremony began with Maria Shriver speaking on behalf of her husband, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, where she recited a letter he sent to the Tillman family. “I’ve been told that Pat admired me,” she read. “But let me tell you, it’s the other way around. I am humbled because the fact is Pat’s story, Pat’s life, his journey—that’s the real American dream. And he sacrificed it for us and our country. That is my kind of hero.”

Arizona Sen. John McCain touched on the hundreds of American families who have suffered the same sacrifice that Pat Sr., Mary, Kevin, Richard and Marie Tillman now must endure. “The courage and patriotism that their loved ones exemplifies is as fine and compelling as Pat’s,” he said. “Their loss should grieve us just as much. Were he here, I think Pat would insist that we cherish their memories and feel their loss no less than his. While many of us may be blessed with a longer life than he lived, few of us will ever live a better one.”

For the first time since his death, the grieving family emerged from seclusion to speak out. “I miss my son a lot,” said Pat Tillman Sr. “It’s been over a week and it ain’t getting any better…I don’t know what the Ranger motto is, but I bet you a buck he upheld it.”

Tillman also expressed his appreciation for the residents of Almaden. “They are a big reason why our kids turned out the way they did,” he said.

Stopping on his way to the podium to sip from a glass of Guinness left on the stage for one final toast, Tillman’s younger brother Richard recited a poem requested by his mother, and then broke down as he talked of how lucky he was to be his baby brother. “He was the biggest f—-ing champion I’ve ever seen,” he exclaimed.

While ESPN’s Jim Rome spoke of Tillman’s career and his character, he stopped to recognize Kevin Tillman as a man with many of the same attributes—hailing him as every bit the hero. The Ranger, who served alongside his brother and then escorted his body home, sat quietly in the front row. “I guarantee big brother is looking down right now every bit as proud of Kevin as Kevin is of Pat,” Rome said.

“1976-2004, that one little dash in there represents a lifetime,” remarked Steve White, who served with the Tillman brothers in Iraq. “How do we spend our dash?”

Paying homage to a lifelong friend with morals that “could not be compromised,” Chad Schwartz added, “Pat wanted to be more than just a professional athlete, he wanted to be an inspiration. He wanted to change people and he wanted to change his country for the better.”

As the tributes continued, it was apparent that Pat Tillman, the man who “embodied everything” had become just that.

Throughout the service, many more approached the podium to speak about “Tilly,” the “free-spirited, fast, feisty kid with a Fabio haircut,” the man with a with a grand heart and an even grander laugh, the man who loved to engage people, the man with an insatiable zeal for debate and an ongoing thirst for knowledge, the man who read everything from the Bible to the Koran and Emerson to Thoreau. All agreed that Tillman lived life on his own terms. But it was his character and his convictions that added countless inches to his unassuming stature.

“To my sister, he was everything,” noted brother-in-law Paul Ugenti. “She is the strength that Pat displayed, and the bravery we all would want…take great notice of his daily pursuit to become a better person. But more importantly, his utter pride, devotion, and love for Marie, his family, and his friends.”

Probably the most moving accolade came from former roommate and Arizona Cardinals teammate Zack Walz, as he raised Tillman’s dog tags to the crowd. “Though I’m holding these dog tags in my hands today,” he said, “I assure you this is the farthest they will ever be from their place around my neck. For as long as gravity pulls, they will hang down close to my heart—the place where Pat Tillman has permanently emblazoned his mark.”

Prior to the service, NFL Commissioner Paul Tagliabue and Players Association Executive Director Gene Upshaw held a press conference and spoke of Tillman as not being interested in headlines or taking bows, rather giving all he had for a cause. “We will be a better place simply because of his courage,” said Upshaw. “When I look over my shoulder, I know he’s watching my back. He’s watched everyone’s back.”

“We’re here to pay tribute to him,” added Tagliabue. “But certainly we’re here to pay tribute to all the other men and women as well. He would be the first who would be giving credit to the rest of the team.”

In a perfect précis of a man with a true American spirit, Shriver echoed the legendary words of her uncle, John F. Kennedy. “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country. Pat,” she said, “has lived those words.”

Last week, Tillman was posthumously promoted from specialist to corporal. He was also awarded the purple heart, along with a silver star, the nation’s second highest honor for “moving without regard for his personal safety” while trying to get his unit out of harms way during an ambush.

In lieu of flowers, the Tillman family has requested that donations be made to the Pat Tillman Foundation, P.O. Box 20053, San Jose, CA 95160. “Pat lived his life dedicated to helping other,” said Alex Garwood, Pat’s brother-in-law. “This foundation will continue his legacy.”